Weekender July 2003 SM PRIDE MARCH &THE BOAT

Weekender Part 1 The Boat

Certain twinges of excitement going through my body on this Thursday
afternoon before "The Boat". I got to own up to this feeling of Da
Ja Vau of how excited I use to get before such an event . Believe me
when I say not only was "The Boat" an event which stands out big
time; it was the start to a hell fantastic weekend where everyone
appeared to be united.

After splashing out the grand sum of £15 in for 3 new pairs of
women's pyjamas that Thursday afternoon courtesy of Prime mark
Hounslow I think to myself who needs to spend an arm and a leg on
fetish gear.

I take a bath, clean my nashers, clean my Dr Martin paddy sandals
(god they've served me well) kiss my long suffering mother good bye
(a mother in a million, cheers for sponsoring the "ST. Thrashmores
flyers by the way) jump on my vespa (which is a little scratched
after my recent disagreement with a red traffic light, where I came
off second best and found myself temporarily lying in a road in
Sunbury) and head off with my arm still hurting every time I hit a
bump.

I arrive at Swan pier at 8pm(this is obviously if I am not mistaken
where the boat is going to set sail) and I meet up with the usual
suspects who are going to be staffing tonight's proceedings. I'm
informed by someone that we are not going to be able to board the
boat till 830pm which is going to make the get in a little hectic,
but there you go, when "The Firm" run an event, we always seem to
have the knack of gelling together and getting the job done no matter
what is thrown in our faces.

Finally we start to board the boat, and under the guidance of nikki
(the fetish version of Delia) we start on the catering with me
occasionally flying into my Gordon Ramsey impersonations if anyone
touches the food before it has been prepared.

People start to board the boat at 9pm, with the catering done and
without any further hiccups we finally set sail down the Thames. Like
all good things, it takes a while for the proceedings to kick off,
but when things start happening, they start happening big time.

Upstairs I spot a little group of five people huddled together in a
corner who I have not seen in bloody ages. They are "The Adult Baby
Brigade". Its really refreshing to know that im not the only one who
feels this way, I'm even introduced to a couple of new babies on the
block one of who is a little timid (nicknamed Timid Tim), and I think
full respect to him for being there after all coming out and being
ones self isn't always the easiest task in the word.

They're this Great aspect about events such as "The Boat". Being out
and about on the scene you don't see people for yonks and yonks and
even more yonks than yonks . Suddenly you have certain events such
as "The Boat", which only rear there heads once a year (as longs
certain fuckin newspapers don't screw it up ) and hey presto you see
these people again. Like "The Adult Baby Brigade", The Co co
concealing brigade, and

That 60-year-old lady who lives in a shoe,
You don't see her that often but she knows what to do
She comes out on the boat and full respect to her for doing so.

Ok I must stop using that tiresome phase "full respect" but I do
respect these people .

Moving on the 4 redbull and bottle of rum are starting to kick in and
I find myself running about the boat feeling that great feeling one
does when one has been granted permission to be themselves, its like
a gift from god, believe me and full respect to him in the sky for
not giving us nice weather.
I'm informed that there are some 135 bodies on tonight's boat and I
probably know at least 70 of them fairly well, Ill probably know
another 20 within the nest couple of hours, and as for the rest they
will probably know who I am by the end of the night.
I spot a mistress downstairs who appears to have two slaves, one of
which is at her feet and the other who is doing god knows what. I am
invited or ordered to go across her lap for a little bit spanking and
yesssssss 1 hour into the proceedings of tonight's boat and I am
having my first little spanky botty of the night and may I add how
lovely it was too.
Well if nothing else I'm going to be happy now ive had my botty
warmed. Not being one to sit still for two long (blame the red bulls
and rum) I start dashing from one side of the boat to the other
taking in what's going on around me, chatting to fellow deviants
along the way.
Zac as always is doing great justice to the proceedings by playing
some top tunes that we all probably use to listen in are long lost
teenage days. I think to myself (as I do) who wants to return to
there spotty teenage days of bygone years when things like this are
happening now, but there again they bring back some good memories of
actually learning the hard way. By the way Zac you have a great taste
in music. With Zac there's none of this housey housey BOOM BOOM BOOM
type of music she plays real music, like we use to listen to in our
day, with real guitars, and drums, and winging singers.
Whilst the music plays on the whippings, spankings, domination, you
name it it is taking place
Not being one to be a voyeur I Move on and I see sitting in the
corner my partner in crime from Februarys "Detention" PVC Kitty Cat
or if you were fortunate enough to attend "Detention" Miss McCarthy
to you , and if you didn't attend , shame on you and make sure you
come to "ST. Thrashmores" Saturday 13th September. We sit, we hug,
we chat, then I get another spanking. God knows what for this time
but I must have obviously done something to rock the boat (HA HA HA),
as Miss Kitty Cat has a habit of spanking fairly hard and tonight is
no exception.
With my newly acquired red bottom I start dashing about the boat once
more in an ultra childish manner taking care not to upset anyone
along the way, because I have been asked not to. I'm feeling
brilliant now; it's like the comfort of being a toddler again. As we
pass the Dome on our way back I half heatedly join in with a
conversation slagging of Tony Blair knowing full well ill be paying
my tribute to him when we reach the houses of Parliament.
More spanking, more whipping, more this more that, another beer, more
dancing, a chat with the bar staff (They were fantastic), The boat
sails on, and everybody is enjoying themselves which in my little
mind is the way it should be.
We reach London Bridge again, and I wave to mine and everyone else's
friends in a certain much talked about club south of the river. I
stop immediately when at least 40 of the players on the boat make
threats of chucking me overboard , and I think to myself god that
club must be loved.
Finally we reach the houses of parliament. Ok it's no big deal
really, but I always thought it was a tradition to moon that big
Mickey mouse that Guy Fawlkes tried to blow up. So there you go,
alone because everyone else is acting mature I hang my little red
bottom over the railing of the boat and moon "The House or
Parliament". Now what I want to know is whom was the bugger shouting
out "Freddie you fucker fall in the river please " after all I'm not
that bad am I?
Like all good things, once again the boat sails to the pier and has
to end. But the nights not over yet we still have the after party,
which has to be done.

29

SM Pride March 2003

So ok after the boat after party at "The Fringe" I arrive back home
at 7am. Because im Freddie and I wear pyjamas when I go out of an
evening time there is no real need to change for bed. So after
kissing my mum good morning, stroking the dog and cats I crash out.
There was something going on Friday night though ive forgotten what
it was, but what ever was going on I didn't attend because Saturday
was the day of SM PRIDE and in my tiny little estimation that is very
important.
The SM Pride march is something very close to my heart, because the
1997 march which took place a week after "Princess Diana s" funeral
was the first event where I actually first came out in full age
play / Adult baby clobber. I suppose it could have been one of those
days that changed things or the day that I actually started drawing
attention to myself (blame the ADHD) but SM Pride day has always been
a good day and a special day.
I'm not one hundred percent sure of the history of SM Pride (shame on
me) but I am pretty sure its got something to do with a few people
who got slung inside for act of S&M. These act were further made
worse by the fact that these people were quite openly homosexual.
Nowadays the SM Pride march is more a case of marching the streets of
London gobbing off and being proud of who you are and what you do.
((((SOMETHING TO BE ENCORAGED)))).
This year, thankfully, I am not responsible for the catering
for "Pervfest" (so if anyone went down with food poisoning this
weekend don't blame me). However I have agreed to help with the
catering for two reasons. One of these is because I like to do my bit
to help with the cause and two because I am a tight bastard and I
don't want to pay a fiver to get in.
I arrive at Conway hall to see if any help is needed with the
catering (it isn't) and after a talking briefly with Alan and
Bergutte I start walking to Whitehall bashing into a few heroin
addict along the way.
So here we are at Whitehall a small group of perverts / deviants /
what ever it is politically correct to call ourselves these day all
gathered around for I think it was the 11th SM Pride March.
As with all SM Pride marches we are very aware that for the next hour
or so we are going to be central London's tourist attraction. I spot
Sir Guy in his jodhpurs riding boots and crop harnessing Bernice to a
pony cart, Mr rubber man in his designer rubber suit which looks like
something from out of space, the TV school girl from Wales that only
shows her face once a year specially for SM Pride (that deserves
respect), Mistress Sandra ((P.e teacher for "ST. Thrashmores)) who
came second only by a red mark in the slippering competition at the
last ST. Thrashmores (PLUG PLUG) Alistair (Harrow Munch) Eve and
Stephan (Watford Munch) and that's only for starters.
I spot a cab driver who drives up and down the road who seemedly cant
believe his eye (I find that hard to believe as his a London cabbie
but there you go). This inspires me to launch into my London cabbie
impersonation of (GOR BLIMEY GUV, SEE THE STAATE OF THEM, WHAT DO
THEY THINK THEY BLEEDIN LOOK LIKE, f—k ME, DID YOUR MUM LET YOU OUUT
THE OUSE LIKE THAT, FIRST RIGHT ROUND THE ROUNDABOUT, SECOND LEFT). I
also spot Bob the builder and his merry henchmen who are
contemplating on singing that famous old timeless tune "Get your tits
out for the lads". However they decide against it as the Metropolitan
Police force are all lined up on the other side of the road on their
nicely polish BMW Bikes. This really brings me to the conclusion that
I thank god I am not like these people and thus that justifies all
the more reason for marching the streets in my teddy pyjamas drinking
Stella out of a baby's bottle. Bit of a pity my Adult baby friends
have not turned up but there again there risk factor is a little bit
higher than mine as in they all have highly paid jobs and im on the
dole.
Things are now beginning to hot up because now the people who are
going to lead the march are begging to appear. As if out of the blue,
the very decent, well-mannered inoffensive, bleached haired Stimpy
arrives on the scene. He gives me a wave and politely wishes me a
Happy SM Pride day. Now this alone is such a nice thing to say, truly
it is, to me it shows the sort of caring in the scene that is sorely
needed, and I love stimpy to death for saying that to me. While we
are on the subject love, Moria looked fantastic and really happy with
the world. Ishmael who when asking for volunteers to hold the
banners confessed to the fact he could be awkward if nobody
volunteered. Guess what? Nobody did and true to form he picked out
people. Unfortunately as much as I would like to I cant hold the
banners because for one I still have a dodgy arm and two I have just
found an escort to hold my hand on the march (Thank you Miss Child
Psychologist from Sans Francisco).
The Drums start rolling, the whips start cracking, the wheels of the
pony carts go round and round, The police escort stands beside us and
we are off.
The feeling is fantastic, every body on this march is seemedly 100%
united in the cause of celebrating being out about who they are.
Moria is dancing to the beat of the drums, Ishmael is waving to the
passers by, Miss Sans Francisco my escort is dancing, Alan and
Bergutte look cool, Zacs threatening to stick a drum stick up my arse
if a dare mention the name of a certain person again, the passers by
are cheering us, the police are well happy with us because we
celebrate, a riot would not be in our nature. Just for 45 minute SM
Pride take over the streets of central London and god bless them for
doing so